Why did my mom not keep me?

It's hard to believe it's been 6 years since we were in China. Allie, is the oldest of the Tongling 12 and she turned 8 on September 20. Tomorrow, Sept 29, is the day that she was found. I think about her birth mom a lot this time of year.

We have had some interesting conversations about our family. One day Allie asked questions about her older siblings (age 31 and 27). She asked, "what is a step sister?" I explained that she and her older sister, Sarah, have the same dad but a different mom. Allie was quiet than asked, "Do I have a step-mom in China?" I replied, "No, you have a biological mom in China." We talked about how Jeff, our 11 year son, grew in my tummy; but Allie do not grow in my tummy.

Then she asked the kicker. . . "Why did my mom not keep me?" WOW

I paused and said, "I don't know...I believe that she loved you very much, but maybe she couldn't take care of you." Then I told her story about another mom who loved her baby boy very much, but the government was trying to hurt the little boy. The mom, and the boy's bigger sister did what they could to protect the little guy, but the mom eventually let another family raise and care for her son, so that he was safe. That little boy was named Moses.

My husband does a lot of teasing inn our family. One day, Allie teasingly called me, "My not real mom." I laughed at her and responded back, "yes, my real daughter!"

She's beginning to grasp the concept of adoption. Just interesting conversations that often leave me "pondering things in my heart!"